Will somebody please explain why the japanese have such bizarre, fucked-up cartoons?

WTF?!!!!

And then there's this: http://yoga.at.infoseek.co.jp/flash/kikkomaso.swf

"I drank what?"

My new favorite quote:

"The stick up his (or her) ass has a stick up its ass"

Just in case you didn't know....

....Em has a quote on brainyquotes.com
Here it is: http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/e/emilylein210095.html

Our foul-mouthed roots:

After reading a hysterical post about the many reasons not to have children at http://jurgennation.blogspot.com//, I got to thinking about my own childhood, namely, my tireless potty mouth...as well as those of my friends, family, & husband. How did we all get to be the accomplished swearers we are today? Well, lets delve into that, shall we? A little psychotherapy for those whose words can embarrass even the crassest of longshoremen....

First up: My husband's family.
When my husband was about 9 or 10, his dad was driving him to swim practice, while also giving him a stern talking-to for swearing the night before. Suddenly, a church bus (yes, I said CHURCH bus) full of people swerved out of nowhere and cut them off. After slamming on the brakes and narrowly avoiding a major crash, my father-in-law floored the gas pedal, whipped up into the other lane right next to the bus, and flipped them the "arm-fully-extended-out-of-the-car-window" bird. If ever there was a case of "don't do as I do, do as I SAY", this was it. And on a personal note, DAMN, is my father-in-law cool.

Not to shortchange my mother-in-law, she has a great story as well.
One time, while driving my then grade school-aged husband and his older brother somewhere, she got exceptionally pissed off at the moronic driver in front of her, and crafted one of the most wonderful malapropisms I've ever heard: "Hey buddy, quit mickey-fucking around up there". My husband STILL uses this phrase to this day. (NOTE: for those of you just joining us from your Special Ed class, she accidentally combined the sayings "quit mickey-mousing around" and "quit fucking around").

Okay, my turn.
When I was a wee lass, my mother was driving in rush-hour traffic with me sitting in the back in my carseat. Some guy cut her off, and she muttered something like "nice one, dumbshit". A short while later, I helpfully pointed out "Look mama, there's another dumbshit". Thus began my career of swearing (another milestone along the way surely had to be the time when I came home from my first day of kindergarten, and told my dad that my teacher was a fuckface. I don't think I've ever seen him so surprised. Come to think of it, not long after that we entered private school.....hmmmmmm).

I will save the story about my friend Lisa's son, Miles, for either Lisa or Dawn, whoever comments first.

Ready, set, go.

self-portrait with nameplate & monty burns...

Bored

Work is boring. What to do, what to do....... I know!!!
Let's write personals ads for the crazy homeless people that I see everyday while walking to work!!!
I'll start it off, and you bastards had better start commenting, or else I'm going to be forced to get back to work. So here goes:

Desperately Seeping Susan:
Incontinent, homicidal, height/weight proportional psycho with club foot seeks same for long walks in the park, Shirley Temple movies, taxidermy, possible LTR. Working knowledge of barbecue tongs a plus. Must have own cricket bat.

Okay, this is a test...

...to see if my husband actually reads this blog, or merely says he does in order to ingratiate me.

The other day, he walks into the living room, and declares triumphantly to no one in particular, "Alright! I finally got those boogers out". Then he pauses, as though pondering something (perhaps the boogers?), turns to me and says "I'm gonna go take a shit" And walks out of the room.

I believe I called after him, "Wait! You're turning me on!!"

Happy Birthday to Sebastian !!!

Well actually, his birthday is on September 19th, but hey. I remembered it now, so here's the birthday boy himself:

(for those of you not in the know, Sebastian is the son of honorary LeinGirl Dawn)

...but it's not exactly breaking news, now is it?

If only Noah's Wish helped people...

I was looking at the animal relief sites on the web and on the Noah's Ark page, found information that wow, if only the organizations trying to help people knew this in advance! Maybe they'd have been better prepared to handle the disaster.

http://www.noahswish.org/Hurricane%20Katrina.htm

Here are a few excerpts:
Aug 27: Noah's Wish is on alert at this time in anticipation of having to respond to Hurricane Katrina.
Update: August 28, 2005 - 11:00 a.m. West Coast Time --Noah's Wish is on full mobilization for Hurricane Katrina.
Update: August 29, 2005 - 11:00 a.m. West Coast Time--Noah's Wish has been extremely busy today responding to a variety of phone calls and e-mails, in addition to gearing up to send our initial team to Louisiana.

And it continues, showing how they were trying to be prepared for the worst and to help animals from the very beginning.

I was also looking for info on the Katrina timeline to see how other groups did and found the following not so comforting item from August 29th. There were also some other lovely items such as Rumsfeld at a baseball game as reported by the Editor and Publisher

This post wasn't intended to be an attack on those who should be protecting (or at least caring about) the people and such, but it does make me wonder why overall, no one seemed as prepared as an organization that helps animals in disasaters. They knew what was coming.

Paging Tameka Shameka Chardeneigh Johnson.....

This email excerpt is from my dear friend Sherry, and has to do with some of the wack-ass naming trends currently running rampant in this country:

I got to thinking, how in the hell did these parents come up with these names? It is as if they rolled a pair of dice and then drew out the corresponding numbers of scrabble tiles. So guess what? That is just what I did. And if you are ever bored enough I highly recommend this entertaining past time. Here are some of my favorites:

Pfaiebia
Czedrje (pronounced 'cheddar -jay')
Sheacaou ( shay-cow )
Bitee (bitty)
Ureen
Hiyroiyd
Aitea (ay-TEE-uh)
Queabouwt (kway - bow)
Ottoan
Vanntuon
O'Ashutoa
Donteivici ( dad is African American, mom is Italian)


I also recommend visiting http://www.notwithoutmyhandbag.com/babynames/// for humor in a similar vein.

Racism in Katrina's wake..

Apparently, black people scavenging for food in New Orleans are "looters", while whites merely "find" food in grocery stores: