The stupidest thing ever invented

You know those kids' shoes that have red lights in the heel, and whenever little Snotley takes a step, they light up? Well now imagine that, instead of lights, there's a squeaky toy in the heel of each shoe. Yes, that's correct, every time your child takes a step, you hear what sounds like 5 epileptics stomping repeatedly on your dog's favorite squeaky toy. Now envision this, amplified by the highly-reverberant surfaces of the San Jose airport concourse, and you can start to appreciate the murderous rage that several hundred travelers felt towards a certain 3-year-old and his stupid-ass mother yesterday afternoon. Perfect strangers were instantly united against this auditory assault, rallying together in a rare show of solidarity against this cavalcade of pure, unadulterated squeaking evil.

I mean, REALLY. What fucking genius came up with this idea?!!!! Shoes that squeak INTENTIONALLY?!!! And what's next on his list? The Long-Range, Powder-Actuated Tampon Applicator (with optional laser scope)? Perhaps the Erratically-Vibrating Mascara Wand? Or maybe the Intermittent Diaphragm? Come on dude, don't deprive the American consumers one more second of The Water-Soluble Pantsuit !!!

Yet another step away from fashionable...

At one point, i seem to recall (or at least pictures suggest) that I was in some way fashionable or at least gave a little care to what i looked like the majority of the time. Several things have killed my drive to look good or at least coordinated, or perhaps even, less than completely oblivious. Not to say that i don't 'clean up nicely' when i try, but really, how often do i try?

The monumental events that have killed my fashion sense:
1. Walking to class (in MN). There is no way i was wearing heels or platforms or even funky boots w/ a minor wedge. This led me from my coolio shoe wearing days in high school (drove everywhere).

2. Getting a job at a midwestern university. Really. the people are nice, but ever since i started working full time in higher education, i have encountered about 7 people who really dress nicely every day (not including the men in suits). Granted, this is one of the things i LOVE about my job, but really, i wore jeans, running shoes and race t-shirts for like a year straight and no one cared. this is probably not a good thing.

3. The ultimate killer: pregnancy. EGADS. fashion faux-paus to the extreme! there are cute maternity clothes, but they're for women who are really pregnant, not just a bit prego. The day when you figure out a way to still wear your normal-sized pants by involving a pony-tail holder, well, you hit a new low. of course this happens on the day when i am pondering if dark purple and brown are really a good combo. But, see #2 and you'll understand why i care not.

i think step 4 may occur after little 'Wolfie' as my mother calls the little guy/gal ventures out into the world and baby hoark becomes a new staple accesory.

eM

STUPID MOTHERFUCKING COCKSUCKING PIECE OF SHIT MONDAY!!!!

Next person that fucks with me today gets 14 swift kicks to the face. And perhaps a knife to the groin if you have anything to do with the installation of washers and dryers.....or, as I like to call them, $1600 Worthless Piece Of Shit Paperweights In My Fucking Basement.

Insert your own joke about licking pussies here:

Jege is in da house

We are officially moved into the house. There are boxes EVERYWHERE.....I have no idea where my back pain medication is, the cats are FREAKING the fuck out, and we cancelled out HBO to save money, now that we are shackled to a 1700 square foot anchor for the next 6 million years. MOMMY!!!!!

P.S. - Happy Thanksgiving, fuckers! :)

I'm grumpy, moody and cranky, why don't I do tech help?

Because for some odd freaking reason, when i'm trying to help people learn how to do something on a computer at work, I put forth a bit of effort to actually HELP people. And I've known tech help people who really do want to help.

However, there is such a large segment of those folks who answer the phone and whine and bitch and moan, like hell, i cannot BELIEVE the phone rang, wtf?!?!? just because it says 'help desk' i never thought anyone would actually have a problem or question more than, the printer doesn't work because i don't have any drivers installed. Well hello, as someone who was a techie for 4 years and still gets a kick out of technology and working with it, i think i can figure most of that crap out and my main problems come when sys admins won't give me access. Then i am forced to call. At which point, it'd be damned nice if someone would just help solve the problem instead of saying things like, 'oh, that's bad' or 'well, we'll have to do something horribly complicated because we've never dealt w/ that before,' just hoping i'll say forget it and they can get back to whining about people who don't like star trek. you'd think something out of the ordinary would provide something of interest or amusement, but no.

and, just for the record, macs and pcs are NOT that different and if you can work on one (save those who fear computers and you just stay w/ whatever freaks you out less), you can work on the other and honestly, figuring out how they work isn't that difficult either so if the tech help people are soooo high and mighty and know evrything, why is there so few of them who can figure out a mac?

And it's not even a monday.

Jege & Dawn (aka dmm) halloween 1992, Iowa city!!!

Neary Lagoon - Santa Cruz

Shot this pic in between meetings while in SC this past tuesday. So there.

The year of the house

I found out a little bit ago that, pending inspection, we just sold our house after being on the market since Monday and got almost 97% of our asking price. yay! Not bad considering it's November, a month not known as being good for sellers.

But it's going to be hell getting through the rest of the day! I want to look at other houses, find dream house, find out price...cry...look again..repeat....we're looking at houses tomorrow and hopefully we'll find something so we can get this whole party started and potentially have a house by x-mas. Or i'm hoping, at least by the end of the year. Then 2005 could truly be the year of the house for the Leingirlz3.