See You In Hell!

Friday, June 09, 2006

Does not compute

It occurred to me this morning that I have been using computers for twenty-eight years of my life. TWENTY-FUCKING-EIGHT. That's longer than some of you have been alive.

It started in grade school, where we quickly learned how to write the following Basic program:

10 print "fuck you"
20 goto 10

Hahahahaha! Isn't that a good one? The teacher would discover the computer screen printing "fuck you" ad infinitum, and throw a fit. She'd have to shut the whole thing off to even get it to stop.

Okay, I have to get back to my current computer, as it does not like hearing about other computers from my past. But feel free to add your own early computing stories here.


Blogger dawn said...

Oh man, I remember getting to play Oregon Trail on the old Apple's at school. And it was on a giant rolling cart in the hall.

Friday, June 9, 2006 at 10:05:00 AM PDT

Anonymous dorkette said...

I remember the greenish-grayish hue of the monitors back then.


It freaks me the eff out that kids now are using computers before they can even read or write.

Friday, June 9, 2006 at 11:16:00 AM PDT

Blogger Jege (Jen) said...

"SHALL WE PLAY A GAME" freaks my shit out, big-time.

I also remember our neighbor's TI computer, with a crappy version of Pac-man that we just LOVED to play. And the modem was something you actually set the phone receiver into.

Friday, June 9, 2006 at 12:04:00 PM PDT

Blogger Thomas said...

Dude, where have you been?

Friday, June 9, 2006 at 8:03:00 PM PDT

Blogger don't call me MA'AM said...

Commodore Vic 20, biotches. Yeah. Rows and columns of hearts moving across the screen. RUN.

I miss JOSHUA. "What is the primary goal?" "To win the game." And the whole time, I was all... is this guy cute? Yeah, I think he is. But that girl is ANNOYING!

Friday, June 9, 2006 at 8:57:00 PM PDT

Blogger goldennib said...

When I was in college, I remember walking by a classroom that had only men in it who were using computer terminals (not stand alone PC's, mind you) and wishing I could be in that class. I am really, really old.

Saturday, June 10, 2006 at 4:45:00 AM PDT

Blogger amycita said...

Dawn: I too recall Oregon Trail! Did you guys have the parts of speech "game" where the main screen was like a tree with different little areas saying verb, adverb, adjective etc? To this day that is why I rule at grammar (at least on a kindergarten level, that is). Also: where did you grow up?! It freaked me the fuck out to read you recalling the apple cart--you aren't from Mind-rot right?!?

Monday, June 12, 2006 at 6:41:00 AM PDT

Blogger amycita said...

Also, I am still very un-saavy regarding computers. Por ejemplo, we just got a new kitten (our 6 month old died from FIP-- a non-catching disease involving the immune system fucking attacking itself due to a mutation of an otherwise common virus)AND I can't figure out how to load a pic from the digital camera so you can see her in all her orange and white fluffy glory! We need help with names too. She came with the stripper name: Brandy. (Everybody sing along now: And the sailors say Brandy you're a fine girl, what a good wife you would be...)

Monday, June 12, 2006 at 6:45:00 AM PDT

Blogger Jege (Jen) said...

You should name her Mimi! As in Screaming Mimi!!! ( I was saving that name for our next cat, but Devin has put a cap on cats...only 2).

Monday, June 12, 2006 at 7:01:00 AM PDT

Blogger dawn said...

Ah, I am from lovely Storm Lake, Iowa- "A better place to live" so sayeth the town slogan (and I typed that with a straight face!). And I have to go with Jen on this one, Mimi is a kickin' name for a cat.

Monday, June 12, 2006 at 9:30:00 AM PDT

Blogger Kato said...

Mmm... feeding off the raw geekiness of this post...

Monday, June 12, 2006 at 11:59:00 AM PDT

Blogger amycita said...

Oh. My. God! I was thinking of Mimi too! But in my eternal classy/culturedness, I was thinking in terms of the heroine in La Boheme, Mimi (also, cleverly, the heroin user/herione in Rent.)

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 at 12:46:00 PM PDT

Blogger amycita said...

However, Rob likes Ginny, as in Ginny Weasley.

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 at 12:47:00 PM PDT

Blogger Jege (Jen) said...

Fuck Ginny!!! Her name should be MIMI !!!!!!!! Who wears the pants in your family, anyway?!!!

wv: dalvmex

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 at 1:27:00 PM PDT

Blogger Floyd's Lists said...

Floyd refuses to use computers.

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 at 2:41:00 PM PDT

Blogger Jege (Jen) said...

FLOYD!!!! Yay, you're back!!!!

Thursday, June 15, 2006 at 6:47:00 AM PDT

Blogger Floyd's Lists said...

Back? Did Floyd leave? No. Did Jege stop leaving hate mail on Floyd's site? Yes.

Thursday, June 15, 2006 at 7:02:00 AM PDT

Blogger Jege (Jen) said...

I'm sorry, Floyd. I will try harder, I promise.

Thursday, June 15, 2006 at 7:15:00 AM PDT

Blogger Crystal said...

too bad the name Mrs. DeeDee Peabody is taken. unfortunate for elliott too, or that would have been her name. i am sure of it.

we were rollin with the KAYPRO yo. i can never get enough of them orange letters.

Thursday, June 15, 2006 at 2:47:00 PM PDT

Blogger Floyd's Lists said...

"Try" is a noisy way of avoiding "do".

Saturday, June 17, 2006 at 3:18:00 AM PDT

Blogger Lisa said...

Mimi reminds me of that chic on Drew Carey. Maybe thus it is perfect for an orange fluffy kitty. Put her on a high calorie diet.

Saturday, June 17, 2006 at 3:07:00 PM PDT

Blogger Lisa said...

The only thing I remember from computers is having to create a program to keep a bowling score. They tried to trick you with that 10th frame...

I sadly was not smart enough to come up with the brilliantly simply Fuck You Program.

Saturday, June 17, 2006 at 3:10:00 PM PDT

Blogger Jege (Jen) said...

Lisa: Amy has informed me that the new kitty's name is Grace, picked mainly because of ironic reasons.

Crystal: If I ever have any children, I am going to name them Mrs. DeeDee Peabody. All of them. It will be like George Forman & all of his kids being named George.

Sunday, June 18, 2006 at 10:05:00 AM PDT

Blogger amycita said...

Wait, who is Mrs. DeeDee Peabody? It sounds hauingly familiar...

Monday, June 19, 2006 at 7:39:00 AM PDT


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