On genetic anxiety...

I have inherited my dad's anxiety issues, and incredible ability to foresee, in any situation, what might possibly go wrong & cause injury and/or embarrassment:

"Carrying that big box up the stairs all by yourself? Well watch out, because you may step on a cat and fall backwards down the stairs and break your tailbone. Or you may gouge the back of your hand on the nail that is sticking out of the wall half-way up."

"Never leave your can of soda uncovered outside. A bee will fly inside and then you'll drink it, and it will sting you in the throat, and you'll suffocate"

"When you're a guest at someone's house, never use their shampoo, because it might actually be Nair or something, and then your hair will all fall out, and then they'll KNOW you were using their shampoo."

Okay, that last one's mine, but you get the picture.

Growing up, my dad would never let any of us kids mow the lawn without first spending half an hour picking rocks (no matter how small) out of the grass, because "The mower will kick that rock right back into your eyeball". Then we had to wear protective goggles, long pants, and steel-toed boots, lest the mower fire an errant stick into our spleen, or suddenly go insane and cut our toes off, like in that movie with Gene Simmons, where all of the machines come alive and kill people.

And don't even get me started on food-borne illnesses. When I was five I knew the words "salmonella", "trichinosis", "botulism", "giardia" and "e coli". My parents had me so terrified, that to this day I cannot eat a burger that isn't so well done that it's BURNT. And even that is bad!!! Burnt meat contains NITRITES!!!! EEEEEKKK!!!!

And. AND!!! ELECTRICITY!!!! NEVER EVER leave ANYTHING plugged in, because the devil lives in the circuitry, and wants to burn the house down.

And who can forget the whole "Engines are magic" lecture.

Oh, dad.